I knew you couldn’t take it anymore
And the blame was all on me
I knew that you were unwanted and unwelcome….
Therefore, I took everything into my hands
I made the decision to do it
To do what was wanted
In the midst of my tears I thought about it
I thought about all the tears that can be saved
I thought about all of the hardship that could be diverted
I mean…. I knew you would be able to feel the tension
So why hurt you?
Why let you even go through it all?
As I sat in silence for two straight days
I contemplated over and over the different choices I could have made
I could have let you remain intact….but….that would be a problem
That would be something that others did not want..
So I made the hardest decision that I have ever made..
I decided to let you go…
I decided to go against how I truly felt
And I got rid of you
Each trickle of blood that trickled down my flesh when I ripped you from within stabbed my soul
A deep emotional hurt that I never knew existed
But I told myself… This…. will….pass
And you know what it didn’t
Instead of throwing you away forever
I decided to lock you away
I mean you were a part of me that I hope to never forget
But..I should for the sake of my sanity….
To know that you grew from constant eruptions of love make you so special..
But to know that the removal of that love was the determining factor of your future presence sickens me
I loved you
But others didn’t
I cared about you
but others didn’t
I really wanted to try to make things work……
But no one else wanted to..
I just couldn’t hurt you
I just couldn’t do it…
You deserve so much more
I didn’t want to see you emotionally crumble
But I wanted you…but others wanted so much more
So in that little box
You will always be
I have to take care of things first
Before you can start to beat
But know that I care
And it was hard for me
But I have to protect my heart
So in this box you will always be